The Daily News

1  The week is practically over, with the exception of the rest of the week.

2    I'm exhausted.

3   Well...

4   The rest of the week is still a go. 

5    Just got word.

6    What to do, what to do, what to do...

7    Tread softly.

8    Yesterday I had the day off because of poysinal reasons.

9    I'd love to say I got into some mischief, but I'd never admit to such a thing. 

10   Nope. 

11   And anyway, I didn't.

12

13   Damn my eyes.

14   

15   Wherever THAT saying came from.

16   No one cares.

17   AnywayZ...

18   Ah, nothing.

19   Moving On, Part One: Did I tell you that my crazed neighbor is normal again?

20   Seesly.

21   A couple days ago we were backing out of the driveway when he, his wife, and his little dog walked in front of us. The dog looked up, cute as can be. He's a little poodle, but a really cute little guy. 

22   All three were out for a morning walk. The sun was shining and we looked at them and waved.

23   That's what we always used to do, before he went crazy.

24   He seemed completely cured. 

25   Go figure.

26    What's funny is that we walked around Home Depot yesterday and got all sorts of things. Stay with me here; I haven't wandered.

27    I pulled the cart around the corner and headed for the checkout.

28   I glanced at the checkout and saw the guy.

29   I'm pretty sure he saw me too, but do you ever do that?

30   I taught this to my students the other day. 

31   Do you ever go into a store and then see someone you know, and you KNOW they see you, but the two of you instantly decide you don't have much to say so you pretend you don't see them?

32   ....And the rest of the shopping trip you keep looking out for them so you won't have to say anything?

33    I will even move up another aisle if I approach the  checkout and they are there. 

34   I'll go grab a roll of tape, or a frying pan or something and toss it into my cart. 

35   I'll then move back towards the checkout, but I will proceed cautiously, checking to see if there is any further sign of the avoidee. 

36   Sometimes it's even people I like, but I feel like I'm not put together enough for small talk. 

37   Worse...ever forget their name, even if you know them HALLA?

38   You know, you just get the erase-eez?

39   Dude I KNOW, right?

40

41   HALLA. My age is begining to show. Plus that is SO So-Cal from what I've been told. Oh, bother.

42   Anybody lookin'?

43     Admit it.

44   You didn't see that comin'.

45

46    Hey, I don't charge for this.

47    Get off me.

48

49    

50

51   Yee-uh.

52    I gottago. 

53    For the record, that was a complete set-up.

54    Have a GREAT day. And remember: America loves you.

55    See you again.

56    Peace.

~H~