The Daily News

1  Well now thanks!

2   I tried my best to get my retirement announced yesterday midday when no-one was reading Facebook, but it still got out there pretty fast. 

3   Within a few hours I got bombarded by all sorts of emails on all sorts of different servers. 

4   Yes, I have aliases. 

5   The secret is out. 

6   I have two gmails, a yahoo somewhere, and my AOL, which for some reason I can't seem to ditch.

7   Maybe it's because AOL was the first, the screechy connection that felt as though I were projecting through the universe, or maybe it's because it was really weird to type, send, and then have someone type back. Not that I'm old or anything, but typewriters never did that. Keyboards did. It was the oddest thing, if you think about it. 

8   As I recall, it was also lightning slow, and you had to go through this mysterious code called HTML in order to go places. It may well have taken a year to get a simple brownie recipe.

9  I don't bake, so it never really involved me.

10   Today I'm going to tell the students. I never know whether they will care or not, but once you've decided on a thing like that, I think it best to get it out there and then move on with life. 

11  I got home last night and again conked out on the couch at around 5. I've been WAY sleepy lately. I'm pretty sure it has something to do with CAHSEE testing, which must cost the state a bundle. 

12   I watched kids at my school finish part two of the math and they were done in around a half hour. That meant they still had close to an hour to sit quietly and do nothing. 

13   Trust me, it was agonizing. I saw perfectly normal students pull their cheeks into all sorts of Stretch Armstrong shapes. 

14   Is it just me? Or should we get rid of high school exit exams? To me, if a student isn't qualified to get a degree, then they should receive a D or F in a class and trust that the teacher knows what he or she is doing. 

15   The amount of hours, tax dollars and students running around the neighborhoods is ridiculous. I'm guessing we had over 2000 students not in the classrooms until just before noon yesterday. 

16   Many came in late with Starbuck's lunches, as though that were some sort of hall pass.

17   I didn't get too angry, since the sophomores had to be at school by 8 a.m. (which stretched to 8:15 because that's the usual starting time for the school day), and the CAHSEE (California High School Exit Exam) targets sophomores. Many had junior and senior friends who got them Starbuck's meals. Good friends, I fancy! 

18  Some teachers took the day off. Others didn't really know how to set the room up or how to get the test underway in a smooth fashion.

19  English teachers are pretty used to hosting bubble tests since we had to give four District Benchmark tests each school year, once at the beginning of the first semester, once at the end of the first semester, once at the beginning of the second semester, and once at the end of the school year, which, if you think about it, might even show a downward trend in achievement, since the kids are pretty burnt out the last couple of weeks of school.

20  Who's minding the store? Who's paying for all of that nonsense?

21  You.

22   Me. 

23   Taxpayers.

24   It makes me cringe. 

25   Each time they have bubble-testing ( for the layperson, that's testing where you need a number two pencil and you bubble the answers) the entire school has to adjust, and usually for a few days. 

26   Schedules are different. Tension arises. If one kid cheats, it could taint the school's reputation. There's a lot on the line. Desks need to be placed in a certain pattern, three-feet apart and all facing forward. 

27   At exactly 8 a.m...<music from the Wall under> the testing begins. 

28   Most normal classrooms can't accommodate 30 + 3 desks that are three feet horizontal and three feet vertical. 

29   Teachers must stay off computers, not grade papers, and walk the room looking for cheaters. Two to three teachers, twenty students. No talking. It's eerie. 

30  It's a terrific way for students to learn, as you can see. 

31   Heads collapse on desks. Girls throw their hair forward like little kids trying to hide under the covers. Many stare off with glazed eyes and open mouths, like lazy guitarists. 

32  The entire thing, I tell you. It's a house of horrors run by boredom and ennui.

33  Ah, it's a living.

34  The entire system needs an overhaul, and the Common Core is a sham, if you ask me. 

35   It is funded by Bush funds. That should tell you plenty. 

36   Dummy people down and they won't know how to protest. They will never understand they have rights. Okay I'm on a tangent. I'd better toss off to bed.

37   Viva le Retirement! I zay vut I veal!!!

38    Unt I veal great!!!

39    All in all.

40    Have a GREAT day. Sincerely thanks for all the love. I've still a lot more to do. 

41   Gottago.

42   Peace.

~H~