Me n' muh bitches.
Say cheese.
1 It's 10:50 of the night before.
2 I need this thing done by midnight.
3 I just finished HOURS of grading stuff.
4 At least somebody learned something.
5 Sheeeeeeeeeeeeit!
6 Diphthong. Doesn't count.
7 I remember my friend Don Lawson pointing out that if you get angry and yell, "Jesus Christ!" that it is considered sinful, but if you yell, "Jesus H. Christ!" it is okay.
8 Different guy.
9 Oh, I imagine. Sounds fair.
10 I remember reading that old poop Vonnegut years ago. He said that any time he needs to say something, "Oh, I imagine" works.
11 I even thought the guy was a genius then, but now that I'm an old poop, I find that it works better.
12 The things we say.
13 I didn't expect to be up this late writing.
14 Or this early.
15 I brought a sheeeeeeeeeeeeitpot full of papers home with me yesterday afternoon.
16 The Ol' Timeh popped down the freeway like Shallow Hal.
17 I worried a bit about opening the trunk and moving the stuff from the trunk to the front door without a mule and saddlebags.
18 I also anticipated stopping at 10 p.m. last night, and actually finished at 10:02. I then spent a little time answering emails and all.
19 I got nearly everything done.
20 What slowed me down was correcting spelling errors, my fave of the night being the word "haphazard," which translates roughly to "half-assed."
21 The student didn't miss by much.
22 She wrote, "hat hazard".
23 You gotta LOVE that one.
24 I drank it in, smiled, and thought about what exactly a "hat hazard" would be.
25 Certainly wearing a stovepipe hat and sitting in the front row of an angry-white-wimminz-menopause convention would be up there.
26 Okay okay okay, OKAY.
27 Anybody lookin'?
28 <Don't tell anyone this but I love my job.>
29 Truly.
30 The clock counts down.
31 Imma get my some ice cream and build me a Matterhorn Häagen Dazs.
32 I believe we threw down on one of those pups a few days ago.
33 Might have been a month ago.
34 I got time.
35 "I ain't got nutthin' BUT time, Mistah Gehsin."
---Joe Pesci as David Ferrie, JFK
37 Goin fo the IC.
38 Got it, made it, downed it.
39 Eye freeze.
40 But it's a good kind of eye-freeze.
41 Keepin' it real.
42 Keepin' it short.
43 Lotta work.
44 I earned that.
45 As master of ceremonies of this nonsense, I officially declare this DN closed early due to massive eye-freeze, followed by a flare of the left nostril.
46 Don't MAKE me mad today.
47 Nah, no worries.
48 I'm a lover, a fighter, and a wild bull rider.
49 That used to be a bumper sticker back when I roamed the West as a cowpoke.
50 Not no more.
51 Not no more.
52 Gottago.
53 All that talk about Pesci and David Ferrie has spies and things climbing through my trees and bushes.
54 It's dark.
55 Gottago.
56 It's Wednesday.
57 Fly low.
58 See you again.
59 Peace.
~H~
No comments:
Post a Comment