The DN

1  Happy Frideeeeeee!!!!!!!

2  Whew!

3   Quite a week. Endless.

4   I thought I was going crazy.

5   Then I heard this: Giants 4, Whoever-they-played 4.

6    Tie game.

7    Therein...

8    TIE ballgames. 

9     Baseball must needs get here, and fast. 

10    I spent last night trying to run off some more answer sheets for that jinxed application I won't name.

11    All my electronics started failing.

12    My theory about electronics breakdowns is this: most electronics breakdowns are fifty per cent human error, meaning me.

13   The other fifty per cent are electronics things. 

14   Happy mix. 

15   It took me about a month to locate what needed copying.

16   Human stupidity. I own it. 

17   It helps when I enter the correct school year in the request for answer sheets. 

18  I dashed to UPS. Closed at 8.

19  Thanks Obama.

20  I then moseyed to Fed Ex. Just as I walked in, some guy hugging about fifteen-thousand sheets of paper shot past me and grabbed the only available machine. 

21  My entire job was something like 94 copies. 

22   I looked at the only other machine in the place and some anarchist was running six-thousand flyers about standing up against the Man. He smelled of sour tennis shoes and incense-drenched body odor .

23   I rolled my eyes. 

24   I want to stand up against the Man, but I have to run off 94 answer sheets that weren't going to get done until the Man gets done under. 

25   Wasn't going to happen with this guy. 

26   He was a revolutionary. 

27   On the side he Sells "Revolution Against Tyranny" garden seeds spiked with sea hemp.

28   Frustrated, I went to the counter and talked with this new gal. "Our only black-and-white machine is in use,and it's a big job. You'll need to wait. 

29   Okay?

30   I walked around the store for a while. No shortage of teaching supplies nor of anarchists. 

31   Sea Hemp Boy kept going, which I wished was true of his deodorant, and the other guy went back out to his van and brought in some luggage. 

32   After around twelve years, Sea Hemp Boy packed his stuff, flipped me a "peaceout" and exited to take on the Man. Godspeed, yo.

33   I made a dash for his copier and slid under the tag. 

34   Safe.

35   I put my card into the machine, and followed directions. For USB, I had to wait while the machine thought about things. Around twelve minutes later, it spit my card back out.

36   I inserted my card a second time. It again buffered, and again spat out my card. Following that, a blue screen popped up. It said, "No Service Available. Card Reader Out of Service."

37   Words to that effect. 

38    I finally went back to the gal at the large machine and she said it was ready. 

39   I was electrified. 

40   I again walked around the store looking at good deals on interesting things like staplers, staple removers, screen cloths, and "We're Out Of..." sketch pads. 

41    The gal behind the counter called me back over and I had to move to some odd counter in order to complete the deal. I completed the deal and left, bowed but unbloodied. 

42    I stopped at Mickey D's on the way home and bought some late dinner. I'm not really a fast-food guy, so I was amazed at McDonald's. I thought of what a brilliant idea it was to focus on America's need for dinners that can be handed to out within seconds. 

43   I was amazed at Krok. 

44   I was amazed at France. 

45   An entire dinner completed and eaten within fifteen minutes with time to spare. I was amazed at America.

46   I'm thinking of switching it up. I eat WAY too healthily if you ask me. 

47   Yeesh. 

48   Endless night.

49   Endless week. 

50   Ah vell. 

51   Like they say in the old movies, "I got my health!"

52   Gottago. 

53   Have a GREAT one.

54   See you again.

55   Peace. 

~H~

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