WRITTEN OLDE STYLE LATE LAST NIGHT!
2 BRB.
3 That means, "Be right back."
4
5 Okay, I'm back.
6 Remember the days when the DN would be written AFTER I would grade papers and plan classes, well into the midnight, or even into the one a.m.?
7 My goal back in the day was to get something out there by midnight.
8 It was a great goal.
9 I know you were expecting some self-deprecating humor.
10
11 Okay.
12 Ramen just beckoned again.
13 Half a moment while I slam my Ramen. <slurps while glasses steam>
<pleasant Ramen pause>
14 Anybody lookin' ?
15 Something mysterious forced my hand last night to go back to that wonderfully idiotic schedule of writing to beat the midnight deadline.
16 See, in my own frabjous mind I believe there are people out there who actually read this nonsense.
17 Good for them, dammit. Good for them.
18 My monocle just plopped into my Ramen.
19
20 I'm all wet with hot soup.
21 Thank JAY-zuss for Windex and Brawney.
22 OWWW!
23 Hot Ramen.
24 Beotches.
25 Anyone lookin'?
26 HAD to do it, my hillbilly bruthuz and sistuz: had to do it.
27 And successfully so as to re-create the past.
28 So Ramen it is.
29 If you refer to Ramen as "Top Ramen" then you old skool.
30 Translation by Younger People From a Guy Who Knows: "You old."
31 Just sayin'.
33 For the record, I never spilt hot soup on me.
34
35 Wuh wuh?
36 Okay. I see how it is. I spelt "spilt" "spilt."
37 I can see the headlines.
38 San Jose Teacher goes viral.
39 Seesly.
40 Can I make money on this stuff?
41 I doubt it.
42 So why am I up 45 mins before midnight writing?
43
44 'Cuz I needed to.
45 It's all about spilt Ramen that never spilt.
46 How can you spill a soup that you ate with a fork?
47 Just sayin'.
48 We'll see how this turns out.
49 Meanwhile...
50 Love youz.
51 You take my heart sometimes.
52 Pray for Dad. He's a rocker. Love you all.
53 Peace.
~H~
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