2 Didn't we just do this?
3 Ah, it's a mess.
4 To follow up from yesterday: that Asian family that kept pocket buzzing me suddenly stopped. Ceased. Just like that. I think they unfriended me. Who wouldn't?
5 Anyway, I didn't get any more group messages from them.
6 I sort of miss them. That kid who jumped into the Christmas-present box was quite a card.
7 I guess somehow the odd occurrence of getting phone calls and being part of a group I never really got to know has disappeared into the mists of time.
8 Yesterday coincided with Garbage Day, and ironically I completely graded the entire first week of the new semester. As soon as I finished entering the last grade, I grabbed my Sharpie and my stamp pad and ran around town stamping people's heads to make sure they had them in on time. I corrected signs in store windows. "Lower prices everyday" "Every day. Two words unless it is used to describe something!!!" I wrote on one sign. The proprietor pulled out a powerful rifle and gave it a click; I looked up and gulped. I continued on my Quest, finding a sign in a store that said, "Keep calm and shop local." "Locally!!!" I wrote.
10 I turned around and that proprietor was again behind me. This time I tossed the Sharpie into a bush and booked it home.
11 Now, it's no mystery to anyone who follows this nonsense to realize that I have searched the entire first half of the year for a Buick with a hood I could jump off. I've threatened several times, but no Buick. I finally found one on my own street. It was for sale. The sign on the window read, "Runs good." I broke the window, pulled out the sign, and wrote, "Runs well!!!" Then came the moment.
10 I jumped off the Buick hood and yelled, "Sic semper tyrannis!", a vague reference to a prehistoric animal, I think. I hit the pavement running. I was a cartoon. Suddenly I looked across the street. That surly neighbor who yelled at Caitlin and Josh for driving through his weeds on Christmas was staring at me. His eyes turned yellow, and then they vanished. Lone nut.
11 He got in his truck, pulled out his speedboat, and chased me, pushing the speedboat again in front of his truck.
12 I screeched around the block, still clutching my Sharpie. He zipped past me and I flew home. Once inside I locked all my doors and windows and climbed under a comforter.
14 I fell into a slumber.
15 Four seconds later, my eyes opened. I was discombobulated.
16 "Whaaaaa...???" I shot straight up. "The Garbage!" I uttered to nobody in particular. I looked out the window and saw I hadn't taken it to the streets.
17 Realizing I had been dreaming I went out at around 11 p.m. I walked along the tall bushes that block my view of that guy's house, just to make sure the Daemon was safe in his home.
18 I peeked out, and there was his truck and his stupid boat, all safe and sound.
19 I brought the garbage to the streets, feeling much safer, since everything that occurred was just a dream.
20 Or was it? Dun, dun, DUNNNNNNNN!!!!
21
23 For the record, the last papers I read before submitting grades were the ghost stories from Halloween. Many kids wrote some GREAT stories, but for some reason, they always had to end them in "and I woke up only to find it was all just a dream..."
24
25 "...or was it...?"
26
27 Those same sorts of stories are always fun, I just never could get why the kids always felt compelled to end them in the inevitable dream. Well, thankfully I do. They're kids.
28 Fun stuff.
29 Moving On, Part One: So.
30 I'm finally free.
No, for REALS.
31 At least for now.
32 And I don't particularly want to give any more homework for the rest of my existence.
33 The garbage is all lined up in bins on the street.
34 Oh, bother.
35 What I REALLY want is to play the ukulele.
36 It's on my bucket list.
37 Moving On, Part Two: Ah, nuthin'.
38 Anybody lookin'?
39 Nothing here. I swear.
40 It's FRIDEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
41 Time to pull out cake pops and confetti!!!
42 Moving On, Part Three: My students are practicing skits. The general theme is this: Persuasion.
43 The exercise is one I copped from a McDougal-Littel lit book, these old damp copies of books that were probably going to be chucked anyway.
43 It was from a Before You Read section as an intro to Julius Caesar.
44 They grouped up and listed persuasive strategies. Those were great because they ranged everywhere from "charm" "offer something in return" to "bribery" "coercion", etc. I had each group choose one and turn it into a short skit.
45 What was fun was I got to teach a mini-drama unit yesterday. It worked famously in four out of five classes. They climbed all over each other, because my persuasive method was this: you guys do this, and no test today.
46 Offer them something.
47
48 That's a hundred-fifty tests I don't have to grade, a vocabulary list I don't need to create, a hundred-fifty vocab sentences I don't have to read, and a hundred-fifty tests I don't have to read next week. AND they're learning, getting credit, and having fun.
49 Common Core, meet Work to Rule. It seems a marriage made in heaven. Most of them were downright giddy yesterday. I played some Scott Joplin tunes from You Tube to add to the Chaplinesque atmosphere of celebration.
50 I also created time for me to learn the ukulele, enjoy more time with family, and get my toenails done.
51 I threw out all the garbage in my life and replaced it with flowers, songs and mirth.
52 So I'm going in today laughing. The only thing I brought home from school yesterday was my ukulele!
53 Good times.
54 I gottago.
55 Have you a GREAT weekend. I hope there is song and fun out there for everyone.
56 See you again.
57 Peace.
~H~
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