Daily News
1 Busy, busy, busy.
2 Nice to see April. It crept up, and then it slipped backward. Just a step or two, but it slipped backward all the same. It sent dry winds. Biblical stuff. It blew me a few steps back, but the fear of my hat blowing away caused my feet to plant themselves in the dry mud. My toes clutched the roots.
3 This kept my hat on my head. Good thing everything's connected.
4 Moving On, Part One: Li'l Jack visited last week, and we're still enjoying his weaves and moves to this minute.
4 Moving On, Part One: Li'l Jack visited last week, and we're still enjoying his weaves and moves to this minute.
5 Matt, Coley and Rocky came up, and they brought Li'l Jack with them. Coley claimed he grew an inch in the night!
6 Little weasel. He screamed and squealed and made us smile every time he would toss a look at us.
7 Mutual Admiration Society.
8 Weird Things on Teevee, Dept.: A pelican just got the tip of its beak stuck on a frog, and then a bug crawled out of the frog's mouth and ran down the pelican's throat. This must have settled some sort of hunger pang.
9 That's a pelican, not a pelican't.
10 Oh, did I mention that some strange movie is on teevee right now? Might have helped with the strange image. Huh? Oh. I did? Fancy that.
11 It's a movie called Basquiat. B-a-s-q-u-i-a-t. He's an artist. Like me.
12 When you watch movies that are about artists, you get things like pelicans, frogs and bugs. All done in some sepia noir filming that looks like it got soaked in Coca Cola.
13 I have a pair of pajamas like that.
14
15 You can't make stuff like that up.
16 Moving On, Part Two: So some of this nonsense will have an art theme running through it.
17 But is it art? Flashback to college days when someone would say something deep, and people would all bob their heads around, even though there was no music playing...
18 Ah, wonderful days.
19 If I could only remember them...
20 Remembrances of things past...
21 The nice thing about us Old Brown Shoes is that we can't remember things past. We can make use of ellipses, even though we know full well that they are tacky. So. Remembrances of things past...
22 I used that early in life. In those days, I got into a LOT of mischief.
23 Or so I've been told. I plead stupidity.
24 As one of my former students used to say every time I'd catch him getting into mischief, "It wasn't meeeeeee!!!!!!!"
25 Uh, Ponch? Little help?
26 Ah, he can't remember either. Great coincidence in here, by the way. I cruised the Soc Med AFTER I wrote about that guy, and it turns out his birthday is this week. Like that? "Soc
Med." Euphemism for Facebook. I calls 'em as I sees 'em.
27 Moving On, Part the Thoid: Had a GREAT time last week, besides goofing on my pajamas, which of themselves are a work of art. Here's the real stuff though:
28 I got to goof on Li'l Jack and the Beebeez. What's a picture worth? Here:
29 I'll share more next week.
30 These things don't come easy, but then whatever does?
31 Meanwhile...
32 Just trying not to paint myself into a corner.
33 "Bow to the horse, bow to the cow, twirl with the pigs if you know how."
---Sandra Boynton
34
35 Scary.
36 Don't ever Google anything having to do with art. The guy writing it is guaranteed to spell words like "favorite," which is a kids' birthday-present word, to "favourite," because anything sounds more artistic if you stick an arbitrary "u" in there. Here is a living example from some guy who wrote about art critic Jonathan Jones:
"From mysterious 30,000-year-old cave paintings to a 'cathedral of the mind' by Jackson Pollock, art critic Jonathan Jones names his favourite artworks of all time--and where in the world you can see them." All paintings in this piece retrieved from: The 10 Greatest Works of Art Ever. This doesn't include all the Warhol stuff, which are posted on thousands of Pinterest sites. Cabal, on the other hand, rests on his own peculiar laurels.
37 Hmmm. Do you have a favourite colour? What did YOU look like when you were a "foetus?"
38 Just hwhat I thought.
39 Hwhat?
40 Art, art, art.
41 'Tis tasty. Okay. Pop quiz:
42 Q. Why did Van Gogh become a painter?
A. Because he didn't have an ear for music.
43 Q. Did you hear about the artist who died?
A. Too many strokes.
44 And finally:
45 A motorcycle cop approached a motorist stopped in the middle of the road holding up traffic just before a river overpass. The officer noticed the driver wearing a beret and scratching away in a sketchbook frantically. He asked the driver, "What in the world are you doing?"
The driver replied, "The sign says Draw Bridge."
46 I'd better hop in my van and get the hell outta here.
47
48 Hey. Where'd my Van Go? <groan>
49 Gottago.
50 See you again.
51 Have a GREAT day.
52 Live life.
53 Love life.
54 Peace.
6 Little weasel. He screamed and squealed and made us smile every time he would toss a look at us.
7 Mutual Admiration Society.
8 Weird Things on Teevee, Dept.: A pelican just got the tip of its beak stuck on a frog, and then a bug crawled out of the frog's mouth and ran down the pelican's throat. This must have settled some sort of hunger pang.
9 That's a pelican, not a pelican't.
10 Oh, did I mention that some strange movie is on teevee right now? Might have helped with the strange image. Huh? Oh. I did? Fancy that.
Velazquez, Las Meninas, (c.1656). Considered
by many to be one of the greatest paintings
ever. I'm in favour of that, because I love putting
pretentious "u's" in words. It is maybe not one
of the greatest paintings ever, but it certainly
qualifies as arugably the creepiest.
13 I have a pair of pajamas like that.
14
15 You can't make stuff like that up.
Proust. (seated)
16 Moving On, Part Two: So some of this nonsense will have an art theme running through it.
17 But is it art? Flashback to college days when someone would say something deep, and people would all bob their heads around, even though there was no music playing...
18 Ah, wonderful days.
19 If I could only remember them...
20 Remembrances of things past...
21 The nice thing about us Old Brown Shoes is that we can't remember things past. We can make use of ellipses, even though we know full well that they are tacky. So. Remembrances of things past...
22 I used that early in life. In those days, I got into a LOT of mischief.
23 Or so I've been told. I plead stupidity.
24 As one of my former students used to say every time I'd catch him getting into mischief, "It wasn't meeeeeee!!!!!!!"
25 Uh, Ponch? Little help?
26 Ah, he can't remember either. Great coincidence in here, by the way. I cruised the Soc Med AFTER I wrote about that guy, and it turns out his birthday is this week. Like that? "Soc
Med." Euphemism for Facebook. I calls 'em as I sees 'em.
27 Moving On, Part the Thoid: Had a GREAT time last week, besides goofing on my pajamas, which of themselves are a work of art. Here's the real stuff though:
28 I got to goof on Li'l Jack and the Beebeez. What's a picture worth? Here:
Cabal, Faces and Half-Faces (c. 2017).
29 I'll share more next week.
30 These things don't come easy, but then whatever does?
32 Just trying not to paint myself into a corner.
33 "Bow to the horse, bow to the cow, twirl with the pigs if you know how."
---Sandra Boynton
34
Rembrandt, Self Portrait With Two Circles,
(c. 1665-9). He's painting YOU.
35 Scary.
Leonardo da Vinci, The Foetus in the Womb,
(c. 1510-12/13).
36 Don't ever Google anything having to do with art. The guy writing it is guaranteed to spell words like "favorite," which is a kids' birthday-present word, to "favourite," because anything sounds more artistic if you stick an arbitrary "u" in there. Here is a living example from some guy who wrote about art critic Jonathan Jones:
"From mysterious 30,000-year-old cave paintings to a 'cathedral of the mind' by Jackson Pollock, art critic Jonathan Jones names his favourite artworks of all time--and where in the world you can see them." All paintings in this piece retrieved from: The 10 Greatest Works of Art Ever. This doesn't include all the Warhol stuff, which are posted on thousands of Pinterest sites. Cabal, on the other hand, rests on his own peculiar laurels.
Jackson Pollock, One, Number 31, 1950 (c. 1950).
38 Just hwhat I thought.
39 Hwhat?
40 Art, art, art.
41 'Tis tasty. Okay. Pop quiz:
42 Q. Why did Van Gogh become a painter?
A. Because he didn't have an ear for music.
43 Q. Did you hear about the artist who died?
A. Too many strokes.
44 And finally:
45 A motorcycle cop approached a motorist stopped in the middle of the road holding up traffic just before a river overpass. The officer noticed the driver wearing a beret and scratching away in a sketchbook frantically. He asked the driver, "What in the world are you doing?"
The driver replied, "The sign says Draw Bridge."
46 I'd better hop in my van and get the hell outta here.
47
48 Hey. Where'd my Van Go? <groan>
49 Gottago.
50 See you again.
51 Have a GREAT day.
52 Live life.
53 Love life.
54 Peace.
~H~
fin.
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