The DN
2 Did I just dream that the Warriors won?
3 Well!
4 How 'bout THAT?
5 That'll teach me to turn off the teevee and take to knitting.
6 I'm breakin' out.
7 No more knitting for me, dude.
8 I'm FAR too manly for that.
9 Uhhhh...
10 Just KIDDING.
11 People are so serious these days.
12 You really gotta watch your pees and cues.
13 Anybody lookin'?
14 Moving On, Part One: Do you wake up each day and say, "Well, at least I made it through yesterday!"
15 Me neither.
16 Do you have trouble deciding between "neether" and "nither"?
17 Here go.
18 Nither is douche.
19 <hashtagonohedihint>
20 Yeah, he did.
21 He lives in Murica.
22 That's a place where we used to have a Constitution.
23 Remember?
24 Moving On, Part Two: I wrote this entire DN this morning.
25 I usually write it the evening prior.
26 Like that? "prior".
27 Sounds pretty douche.
28 <insert lady with pie.>
29 Mmmmmmm. Pie.
30 AnywayZ
31 It's "anyway" you douche.
32 To remain free as a citizen to say anything I wish, I shall include a copy/paste from Dictionary.com:
douche
[doosh] Show IPA
noun
1.
a jet or current of water, sometimes with a dissolved medicating or cleansing agent, applied to abody part, organ, or cavity for medicinal or hygienic purposes.
2.
the application of such a jet.
4.
a bath administered by such a jet.
5.
33 Evidently if you copy/paste from Dictionary.com you can never return to the justify/left area of your blog.
34 I didn't realize that. It seems communistic to me.
35 All apologies.
36 It's similar in some sort of way to walking around with your underpants riding ridiculously higher than your pants.
37 Last time I looked that was constitutional.
38 So was saying stuff.
39 Remember those days?
40 Anybody lookin'?
41 I need to thank my nephew Brian for reminding me that we even HAVE a Constitution.
42 He stood up for it when the rest of the world wanted to hang that douche bag Sterling for talking.
43 Brian was right.
44 Brian IS right.
43 Brian is hella cool.
44 Brian is an American.
45 Brian is the extreme opposite of a douche.
46 Loves ya Bri.
47 Anybody lookin'?
48 Freedom.
49 I'm lovin' it today.
50 Go all sports' teams.
51 Go everyone.
52 Love yuz Murica.
53 I taught Simon and Garfunkel's America yesterday.
54 I played it on guitar and sang it.
55 I loves me some Murica.
56 Gottago.
57 See you again.
58 Peace.
~H~
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