The Daily News

The Once-in-a-While

Daily News

1 Well. Happy Windsday from Lake Tahoe!!!

2 Got up on Sunday and been confused ever since.

3 It's funny because you sort of plan all year for a vacay, but once you get to where your cabin is, you realize you have to completely reinvent your entire organizational artillery.

4 And the first night was a bit of a late arrival, and we had time to toss suitcases around the place, throw on a coat, and meet people at The Beacon. It's the Law.

5 We closed the joint. Had a GREAT waiter who was able to table a huge mob AND keep all the orders straight.

6 The advantage of The Beacon is that it is close by, and it tends to have killer sunsets.

7 I almost couldn't sleep that first night I was so happy to be up here.

8 Absolutely sensational

9 Even the bears have been sort of interesting. I saw one bear skitter over two front porches and disappear, all within a mile of where I am staying.

10 Turns out we've all seen 'em. Helene saw one across the street this morning.

11 It isn't unusual to see a few bears in the course of two weeks. And they are interested in one main thing: eating garbage.

12 I must say, a LOT of people have BBQ's going, so those bears are enjoying the great outdoors with all the rest of us.

13 Man, oh man. And it is only Windsday. I thought of Winnie the Pooh because I miss the Beebeez, all three. They're gonna get up here soon, along with Rocky, the flying dog. I baby-proofed our huge yard with pine cones and tree branches so Li'l Rocks could have the run of the place. He'll probably scare the daylights out of thems bears!

14 So. How have I spent today? Shopping and watching House of Cards. Go figure. But we have a movie-studio teevee here. Took about eight years to figure out how to program the thing.

15 Heck, it took me most of the morning to get the headphones working on my cell.

16 Ah, I love getting away from it all.

17 Moving On, Part One: The other night, I found out that my cousin Sue saw the Beatles in I think 1964 at the Cow Palace. I never met anyone who actually saw them. She got in for around six dollars and insists she didn't scream. I was all smiles hearing her tell of the concert. She and my cousin John got me into the Beatles. I never looked back.

18 Here is a song list that they did that day:

"Twist and Shout"

"You Can't Do That"

"All My Loving"

"She Loves You"

"Things We Said Today"

"Roll Over Beethoven"

"Can't Buy Me Love"

"If I Fell"

"I Want to Hold Your Hand"

"Boys"

"A Hard Day's Night"

"Long Tall Sally"

19 I can't even imagine. She said she couldn't hear a thing except screaming. Makes sense.

20 Brian Epstein, their producer (whatever THAT means) insisted they play small venues like the Cow Palace because he worried they might not draw at a huge stadium like Candlestick Park, where they had their final live show ever.

21 Anyway, we really are overall a family of Beatles' people.

22 I realize not everyone likes the Beatles, and that some have sheer disdain for them and for all their pop nonsense.

23 To each. We're just getting warmed up. The other day I brought my Yamahahaha acoustic down to the Lake. I brought my guitar stand but really didn't take and play until a couple of my cousins requested some songs.

25 I began with I think Scarborough Fair, which I am able to handle if no one is listening carefully. I love the beach because I can screw up, but my sisters' and my cousins' voices can travel to the heavens when we are firing on all cylinders.

26 After I warmed up, I played some fun stuff like I Want to Hold Your Hand and She Loves You, two of their biggest hits ever.

27 Just fun stuff. We're probably heading out for Pope Beach in a while. My daughters, both of whom can sing beautifully, will be getting here this afternoon. I think. I've been away from communicating because I'm working on this nonsense.

28 Moving On, Part Two: Lisa Olsson Potts, a super-fun family member, just asked our group if they would like to river raft this weekend. A few years ago, we all dressed up like Pirates and cruised down the Truckee river, hiding behind trees and then ambushing unsuspecting rafters.

29 Before you judge, the FIRST time we all went river rafting, people hid out and ambushed us. River rafting on the Truckee has that element, so we simply took it to the next level. Needless to say, it was a blast, and we learned to bring huge umbrellas and open them so we could move to our targets. It was all in fun. When we got to the disembarking area, an outside restaurant, we were met with applause from everyone.

30 I'm smiling just thinking about it. I'm older now, but I haven't matured one iota.

31 If this all sounds a bit rushed, it is because I'm eager to get back to the beach.

32 Ah, nope! My sister Gayle just came by with Hannah, her Bernese Mountain puppy. Such a sweetie!!! Great visit!!!

33 Moving On, Part the Thoid: I think I'm going to throw a couple of jokes your way, from this collection called The Mammoth Book of Jokes, edited by one Geoff Tibballs. Get a helmet. I had a picture of the book, but it vanished. The fonts are changing, and this whole piece is suddenly haunted.

35 Ah, I ain't trippin'.

36 So here are a few and then I'm outta here. Hope you receive a chuckle or two.

37 A driver was speeding down the highway late in the afternoon when he saw a police car behind. For a while he tried to out-race his pursuer, but, after touching 120 and still not managing to shake him off, he realized it was a lost cause and pulled over.

The cop stepped out of his car. "Listen, buddy," he said. "I had a really, lousy day and all I want to do is go home to my wife and kids. So if you can come up with a good excuse as to why you were doing 120 back there. I'll let you off."

The driver thought for a while and said: "Three weeks ago, my wife ran off with a cop. When I saw you in my rear-view mirror, I thought you were that officer and that you were trying to give her back."

38 Hey. Why was the farmer hopping mad? Someone stepped on his corn.