The Once-in-a-While
Daily News
1 I woke up early, then went back. Tried to smother myself with a Wal-Mart pillow. I knew I should never have put that Fudgsicle in my back pocket when I was a kid. I must be getting punished for something I did as a kid. That's the Catholic in me.
2 It's the end of Western Civilization as we know it.
3 SMH.
4 Ah, Trump elected. Our long nightmare is over.
5
6
7 Wow.
8
9
10 At least we can get back to normal living.
11
12
13 I'll stop now.
14 Never saw this comin'. Watched it happen. Did a double-take.
15 So let's go with it.
16 Who knew?
17 Ah, I can handle this.
18
19
20
21 Ever feel like some bully just took the apple out of your lunch?
22 Yeahmeneither.
23 So I think I'll attempt to change the subject.
24
25
26 For the record, I've duct-taped myself to Le Luge, my old brown Lay-Z-Boy chair so that I won't run outside and scream something stupid to my neighbors. I've taped my mouth shut as well.
27 We, as a country, just voted for a racist, sexist, foul-mouthed miscreant who could blow up the planet if a tick bit him in the ass.
28 That's okay tho. All is forgiven because he is a businessman.
29
30 We still have coffee.
31 Moving On, Part One: Uh...think it'll rain?
32
33 Forgive them, Lord. They know not what they do.
34
35 That's the Catholic in me.
36 Do you believe this?
37
38
39
40 I'm well into the 4 a.m. and can't sleep for lack of think.
41 Oh, I imagine we will awaken, and then get on with our normal lives.
42 I'd get a haircut if I figured it'd make any sort of difference.
43 Grooming, after all, is everything.
44 I wish to apologize to my descendants for what we just did. Forgive us, for we know not what we done did.
45 I'm happy to say that I had little to do with it.
46 I'm just well into the 4 a.m. and can't sleep...
47 I'm tempted to call last night the dreariest of my existence.
48 But I won't.
49 I won't.
50
51 The hell I won't.
52
53 Call in sick. That's your only option.
54 Somehow 'Murica just voted in a...
55 Ah, whatevs.
56 Stumble through the day and pretend it never happened.
57 Or bask in the rays of it, if that's what suits you.
58
59 It's just that...
60
61 Well, it just ain't purty.
62 It just ain't.
63 So.
64 Let's git back to the bizness of livin', shall we?
65
66 Moving On, Part One: Can anybody explain to me why there is an apostrophe in "ain't"?
67
68 It'll never be the same.
69
70 'Murica.
71 It'll never be the same.
72 That's about it.
73 Gottago.
74 See you again.
75 Have a GREAT day, in spite of it all.
76 Live life.
77 Love life.
78 Peace.
4 Ah, Trump elected. Our long nightmare is over.
5
6
7 Wow.
8
9
10 At least we can get back to normal living.
11
12
13 I'll stop now.
14 Never saw this comin'. Watched it happen. Did a double-take.
15 So let's go with it.
16 Who knew?
17 Ah, I can handle this.
18
19
21 Ever feel like some bully just took the apple out of your lunch?
22 Yeahmeneither.
23 So I think I'll attempt to change the subject.
24
25
26 For the record, I've duct-taped myself to Le Luge, my old brown Lay-Z-Boy chair so that I won't run outside and scream something stupid to my neighbors. I've taped my mouth shut as well.
27 We, as a country, just voted for a racist, sexist, foul-mouthed miscreant who could blow up the planet if a tick bit him in the ass.
28 That's okay tho. All is forgiven because he is a businessman.
29
30 We still have coffee.
31 Moving On, Part One: Uh...think it'll rain?
32
33 Forgive them, Lord. They know not what they do.
34
35 That's the Catholic in me.
36 Do you believe this?
37
38
39
40 I'm well into the 4 a.m. and can't sleep for lack of think.
41 Oh, I imagine we will awaken, and then get on with our normal lives.
42 I'd get a haircut if I figured it'd make any sort of difference.
43 Grooming, after all, is everything.
44 I wish to apologize to my descendants for what we just did. Forgive us, for we know not what we done did.
45 I'm happy to say that I had little to do with it.
46 I'm just well into the 4 a.m. and can't sleep...
47 I'm tempted to call last night the dreariest of my existence.
48 But I won't.
49 I won't.
50
51 The hell I won't.
52
53 Call in sick. That's your only option.
54 Somehow 'Murica just voted in a...
55 Ah, whatevs.
56 Stumble through the day and pretend it never happened.
57 Or bask in the rays of it, if that's what suits you.
58
59 It's just that...
60
61 Well, it just ain't purty.
62 It just ain't.
63 So.
64 Let's git back to the bizness of livin', shall we?
65
66 Moving On, Part One: Can anybody explain to me why there is an apostrophe in "ain't"?
67
68 It'll never be the same.
69
70 'Murica.
71 It'll never be the same.
72 That's about it.
73 Gottago.
74 See you again.
75 Have a GREAT day, in spite of it all.
76 Live life.
77 Love life.
78 Peace.
~H~
fin.
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