The Once-in-a-While

Daily News

1  "Okay then, we'll see ya later!"

2  I overheard that comment yesterday morning at approximately 6:52 a.m. Garbage morning in these parts. I had gotten up pretty early and decided to turn all the Christmas lights on. 

3  Even though the parties were all over, I still wanted to do a couple things Christmassy. But I was also clean-centric. 

4  I was doing one of those deals where you go out to the garbage cans around six hundred times with individual items you forgot to bag.

5  And to me, I'd rather make the trip out than keep some bad-smelling stuff hanging around my sink, or even my garage, where I keep the cans.

6  I'm so anal that sometimes I freeze the garbage in our extra fridge in the garage.

7  So there I was, all silhouetted in my big ol' black shorts, taking one last real gander at our front-window Christmas display. It looked better than ever. And I couldn't help but glance down the street, where a van had its lights on.

8  "Okay then, we'll see you later."

9  And that was that.

10  Christmas, 2017. 

11  Tough Christmas. Lots of people seemed to be going through some really rough times. It's tough to list them here because I wish to respect everyone's privacy, but one thing did hold true through all of this: most people had a sense of this being a soulful Christmas. And even if it's bad, it's still soulfully good. 

12  So be merry. And now we begin to dismantle.

13  It's always so weird that New Year's is right down the street, getting set up by people who love wearing those New Year's glasses that have the New Year on them.

New Year's guy 2017. Last year's model.

New Year's guy 2005. Lennonesque.

New Year's glasses 2018. Faceless.

14  It's always been a bit gaudy to me. In my early days, I used to love blowing party horns and acting the fool.

15  And then I did the same thing in my later days. 

16  But somewhere in there...when does it happen??? Thirty? Forty? Somewhere, I began going to sleep on New Year's Eve right around 11 p.m. 

17  I'd watch all the hoopla on TV, and I'd see people cramming the streets in Chicago, New York, Detroit and yeah.

18  It NEVER had the same soul to me. 

19  And I was a Christmas Scrooge for years, and finally realized that much of Christmas IS the real deal. 

20  So feeling soulful isn't a bad thing.

21  I'd almost like New Year's to go away, but it's a cable car with screeching breaks. 

22  Like that?

23  Yeah, me neither. 

24  San Francisco kid. I was born there.

25  And I've always been proud of that.

26  AnywayZ...

27  I hear a garbage truck. That seems impossible since it is only 7:19 in the morning. This day is already ten times faster Christmas Day.

28  And that's when I wrote this. Yesterday. Tuesday. Even though today is Wednesday. 

29  You know why?

30  Ah, just because. 

31  Moving On, Part One: Sometimes when I write this stuff I cruise my folder of DN pics. I often copy/paste stuff if it looks like it would remain in keeping with the idiotic stylishness of this medium.

32  

33  Like that? "Medium."

34  Wasn't Christmas just a couple days ago?

35  I'm going to fish for a random DN pic. I have it in my mind's eye, but I don't know where it went. 

36  Hold on.

37  Hey. Found a few new ones. Why not? Here go:

38  Don't say I never did nuthin' for ya.

39  Jazzes it all up, doncha think?

40  I'm tellin' ya. 

41  It's out there.

42  That is all I have to say.

43  All you'll get from me is "Mum's the word!"

44  That's NEVER true.

45   Mum.

46  Moving On, Part Two: One of the funniest things I've seen in quite awhile on the social media happened on Christmas Eve. My good friend and former colleague Nicole Hermatz Devincenzi had ordered a cake from a local bakery and asked them to put Merry Christmas on it. I assume that whoever took the order asked her what it should say. If I know Nicole, she probably said words to the effect of, "Merry Christmas, with decor under it." She might have even wiggled her fingers to emphasize a little decor.  I mean she just wanted to get a cake and get out, like you do at a bakery.

47  Here is a picture of the cake right after she opened the box:

This made my entire day!

48  One of thousands of memories that happen this time of the year. That story will be handed down to future generations, all of whom should enjoy a hearty laugh. 

49  And so this is Wednesday.

50  I got Beatled out at Christmas. 

51  Amid all the wrapper paper and fun with family and all, I got a gift that knocked me out. 

52  I got this:

53

I got this. Thanks, Helene. 

LOOOVED it!!!

54  I always felt that Help! was brilliant, one of those movies that if you listen to the backstory, it painted itself. All of the added features and backstories ensure a lovely coloring of one of the wittiest and enjoyable films of all time. It is officially a classic. 

55  I got that and a lot more this Christmas.

56  Today, ladies and gents, is officially the day for you to sneak off, return a few items, and get yourself a gift for YOU. Most of you have earned it, some haven't, but you go around only once.

57  Spoil yourself. Indulge. It's the moment.

58   'Tis still the season, for one more day. Indulge. 

60  I gottago.

61  Have a GREAT day.

62  We'll see you again.

63  And as always:

64  Live life.

65  Love life.

66  Peace.

~H~

fin.